i never crossed the atlantic



i'm contemplating so many things. i'm a bad check bouncer but i just want to be free. what, oh what do i want to do with my life? my lips won't stop bleeding because i can't stop picking at them. everytime i think i know what is going on, or what i'm doing, something happens to completely revoke that.

my three favorite hobbies are sewing, baking, and playing guitar and that is what i spend my days doing. i made 7 layer cookie bars the other night. my sister is addicted to them and theyre almost all gone. ive been useless since i quite dancing and i miss it so much. ive been excercising more. crunches and lunges and arm excersices and such. i started the Bell Jar by sylvia plath last night. i'm only about 40 pages in but i love it.

today i laid on my bed covering my eyes and began to listen to a live version of the Next Messiah. my stomach just dropped and suddenly the world was beautiful.